It is only in their dreams can men be free,
It was always thus and always thus will be..
A gentle whisper breaks the sound of silence,
When the daily needs bound men in chains..
Through out the mellowed warmth of a day,
As long as the sun shines, the slaves make hay..
The men lose out as the softer moment flies by,
As the jingle of nature's song is lost in the sly..
Whence the glow of the golden sun gets dim
An enslaved heart fails to fill life to the brim..
As the darknes of the treacherous night falls,
The cry of a tired soul is bounded by the walls..
And in spite of all these follies do we love our dreams
For it gives meaning to our life despite our screams..
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
If Only
If only the ears could hear what the lips dare not utter
If only we could make meaning of the words in the clutter..
If only there was a perfect solution to the problems of ours
If only we could pour out our souls without quoting others..
If only remorse could pave the path for a better tomorrow
If only guilt worked and could bring in ever lasting sorrow..
If only eyes could see through what the ears can not hear
If only the hearts of mankind were not bounded by fear..
If only we could dream and hope to cherish them in reality
If only in the pursuit of dreams, we never forgot humanity..
If only banks were there for those who needed it the most
If only leaders could be praised and given a heart felt toast..
If only men could hold steady to their dearest value system
If only man could progress while keeping the nature in tandem..
If only words could be taken back even after being delivered
If only people knew when their wishes are about to be heard..
If only men and women could understand each other better
If only all relationships could be built to last forever..
If only more women could be more virtuous than their looks
If only the so called nerds were valued as much as their books..
If only one could win without bearing the scars of a sour victory
If only life meant more than a race for a glorious place in history..
If only we could live in a world of no asymmetry in information
If only there were perfect markets and also perfect competition..
If only silence meant more to a few than some frivolous words
If only romance found meaning beyond the words of the bards..
If only kids were not burdened with the pressure of the future
If only mankind could live in harmony with the brothers of nature..
If only we could pass through time without twisting the facts
If only mankind knew the value of remorse for not so virtuous acts..
If only we could kiss a frog and hope to find our princess divine
If only the romance post marriage was not reduced to a whine..
If only there was a perfect romance even if the pockets were poor
If only lovers could know in advance what they will have to endure..
If only super-heroes existed to undo all the wrong that was done
If only our heroes could change the society where wrongs were none..
If only this tormenting world was a better place than it is now
If only I could change it, without resorting to HOW..
If only... but sadly it is no going to be so, soon enough..
"If Only" thus remains a sore throat and a bit of a cough..
If only we could make meaning of the words in the clutter..
If only there was a perfect solution to the problems of ours
If only we could pour out our souls without quoting others..
If only remorse could pave the path for a better tomorrow
If only guilt worked and could bring in ever lasting sorrow..
If only eyes could see through what the ears can not hear
If only the hearts of mankind were not bounded by fear..
If only we could dream and hope to cherish them in reality
If only in the pursuit of dreams, we never forgot humanity..
If only banks were there for those who needed it the most
If only leaders could be praised and given a heart felt toast..
If only men could hold steady to their dearest value system
If only man could progress while keeping the nature in tandem..
If only words could be taken back even after being delivered
If only people knew when their wishes are about to be heard..
If only men and women could understand each other better
If only all relationships could be built to last forever..
If only more women could be more virtuous than their looks
If only the so called nerds were valued as much as their books..
If only one could win without bearing the scars of a sour victory
If only life meant more than a race for a glorious place in history..
If only we could live in a world of no asymmetry in information
If only there were perfect markets and also perfect competition..
If only silence meant more to a few than some frivolous words
If only romance found meaning beyond the words of the bards..
If only kids were not burdened with the pressure of the future
If only mankind could live in harmony with the brothers of nature..
If only we could pass through time without twisting the facts
If only mankind knew the value of remorse for not so virtuous acts..
If only we could kiss a frog and hope to find our princess divine
If only the romance post marriage was not reduced to a whine..
If only there was a perfect romance even if the pockets were poor
If only lovers could know in advance what they will have to endure..
If only super-heroes existed to undo all the wrong that was done
If only our heroes could change the society where wrongs were none..
If only this tormenting world was a better place than it is now
If only I could change it, without resorting to HOW..
If only... but sadly it is no going to be so, soon enough..
"If Only" thus remains a sore throat and a bit of a cough..
Thursday, July 14, 2011
May you have
May you have all the happiness, and all the luck that life can hold..
May you, at the end of all your rainbows, find that illusive pot of gold.
May you be really lucky, for luck in love is as slippery as an eel..
May you get to make others jealous, for how your love makes you feel..
May you learn to revel in joy, even when the wheel of fortune turns..
May you have all the love needed to heal the scars caused by the burns..
May you learn to live for the moments that scarce come by daily..
May your love learn to accept you as you are despite your gravest folly..
May you know what that frown means long before the lips grow old..
May you train your heart to hear, so that you never need to be told..
May you have food and raiment, the loving pillow for your head..
May you spend years in heaven, before satan knows its time ur dead..
May your story be made to live, even when your chldren grow old..
May your love live for eternity, and change the lives it touches to gold..
May you, at the end of all your rainbows, find that illusive pot of gold.
May you be really lucky, for luck in love is as slippery as an eel..
May you get to make others jealous, for how your love makes you feel..
May you learn to revel in joy, even when the wheel of fortune turns..
May you have all the love needed to heal the scars caused by the burns..
May you learn to live for the moments that scarce come by daily..
May your love learn to accept you as you are despite your gravest folly..
May you know what that frown means long before the lips grow old..
May you train your heart to hear, so that you never need to be told..
May you have food and raiment, the loving pillow for your head..
May you spend years in heaven, before satan knows its time ur dead..
May your story be made to live, even when your chldren grow old..
May your love live for eternity, and change the lives it touches to gold..
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Musings of a poor man
Well, a very recent conversation with a female friend made me restless for a few days. As per her allegation, I am probably a bit biased against many women. What made me really restless was that during my argument with her in our brief conversation, I was sure that I was fighting for equal rights for men. Now I personally am against every kind of differentiation and this thought actually had more effect on me that I thought during the course of the discussion. While this may sound really odd, coming from a male member of a supposedly patriarchal society, I somehow was convinced that the times and tide has changed, after conversing with my fellow sufferers. A major reason for this could be the increasingly disadvantageous sex ratio for our gender, as recorded by the census.
Now, my major contention with her was that I argued that “most women prefer that their husbands should have a extremely good career and yet he should contribute equally to what her responsibilities in the house hold activities”, as being unfair. My contention was if the husband was the major bread earner, then in all probability that his responsibilities in office would be much higher than his better half, and thus it would be not be fair to expect him to share house hold job responsibilities with the wife EQUALLY, and there was a need to recognize his other contributions in the welfare of the family. However, given that we live in a evolving patriarchal society, such a statement would invite wrath from my female counterparts as expected.
Thus my friend argued that the times have seriously changed now and women are have actually made their presence felt in professional spheres (which I agree to, and support) and are now having similar potential, career wise, as their male counterparts.
Since this was an issue related to marriage, what best place to actually search for data than BengaliMatrimony, the website which brings men and women together in arranged marriages. Although such a sample is inadvertendly biased to an extent, I thought it would at least provide an indication of the partner preferences of the modern bengali women.
So I started an advanced search in the website for all the ladies in the age group of 21 to 28, unmarried, having educational qualification of graduate and above, residing in Kolkata and having a castebackground of Brahmins, Kayasthyas Khsatriyas and Vaidyas, and had their photos in their profile. The search returned 1148 results, of which 442 were not working(or are studying) and 706 ladies were working. Of the ladies who were working, 242 were in the income category of less than 1 Lakh INR of annual income, 293 ladies were earning from 1-2 Lakh INR, 128 ladies were earning 2-5 INR, 41 ladies were earning 5-10 Lakh INR, and 2 ladies were earning above 10Lakhs INR.
What was interesting to note that in their partner preferences, amongst all these working and non-working women, the count of women expecting that the groom should have a salary at least 4 times their own current salary (or above 6 lakh INR for the non-working women) was 666 or 58%. 32% or 367 ladies wanted a groom with a salary expectation of 2-4 times their own salary. Only 10% or 115 ladies had not mentioned the salary expectations from their partner, out of which 94 had not set any partner expectations, and thus their profiles could be considered incomplete. Only 13 ladies (all of who who were earning more than 8 lakh INR) had a partner expectation of a salary of 20 lakh or above, which in terms of sheer percentage, exceeds 200% their own annual income.
Now, amongst the 442 women who were not working, 242 were engaged in higher education and 200 have completed their education and were not working. Out of the latter group (Education completed and not working), 168were graduates and 42 were post-graduates. 70% of this segment (442) wanted apartner with an income of 8 Lakhs and above and 10% wanted a partner with an income of 10 lakhs and above. Of the women pursuing/completed post-graduation / Engineering / professional courses, 60 women had a preference for a partner earning more than 12 Lakh INR, 128 women wanted a partner with a salary of above 8 Lakh INR and only 26 women had a partner preference in terms of income below 6 Lakh INR. 30 women had not set their partner preferences. This was coming from a segment who are yet to start earning and thus yet to realize the practical hazards associated with even a low paying job.
What was surprising was that many women considered themselves “Brilliant as a student”, “highly qualified”, with “highly professional background” and yet had no jobs even in the age category of 24-26 after completion of their education or even did not manage to complete their post-graduation. Even the women with jobs where annual earning was less than 1 Lakh INR, considered themselves extremely “careerist” and wanted a husband who would support their ‘blossoming’ career with a pay-package of above 8 Lakhs INR. I would definitely not like to comment on their self perceptions when it came to external attributes, as compared to reality. These kind of attracted my attention since I am not a strong fan of narcissism.
Please note that I am definitely not against women working to unlock their true potential.
But today, few of these women need to recognize that if the burden of expectation was so much on the man to earn and provide for a luxurious living, why is it wrong for a man to expect that his partner would contribute more on the family management front? If your expectations from your partner in terms of earning potential was a few multiple of your own salary,how does one equate that to having equal job responsibilities in the career,and thus should share equal responsibilities in home also? If marriages are about equality, how are such partner expectation a reflection of equality in terms of providing overall resources for the welfare of the family?
By no means I am advocating that men don’t need to be concerned about house hold activities, they definitely do. I am strongly against the gender-job role biases in our society also.
I am only a strong advocate of true equality of all, and investment of comparable resources for the welfare of the family where both the partners have equal stakes.
Thus this amazingly stupid piece of research on which I spent 3 sleepless nights.
Some Idiots says, "Behind every successful man, there is a woman". But nobody wants to admit openly the fact that "Women prefer to go for the successful men only, given a choice". An article that came out later presented somewhat close views http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/Men-go-for-looks-women-profession/articleshow/6335911.cms
Now, my major contention with her was that I argued that “most women prefer that their husbands should have a extremely good career and yet he should contribute equally to what her responsibilities in the house hold activities”, as being unfair. My contention was if the husband was the major bread earner, then in all probability that his responsibilities in office would be much higher than his better half, and thus it would be not be fair to expect him to share house hold job responsibilities with the wife EQUALLY, and there was a need to recognize his other contributions in the welfare of the family. However, given that we live in a evolving patriarchal society, such a statement would invite wrath from my female counterparts as expected.
Thus my friend argued that the times have seriously changed now and women are have actually made their presence felt in professional spheres (which I agree to, and support) and are now having similar potential, career wise, as their male counterparts.
Since this was an issue related to marriage, what best place to actually search for data than BengaliMatrimony, the website which brings men and women together in arranged marriages. Although such a sample is inadvertendly biased to an extent, I thought it would at least provide an indication of the partner preferences of the modern bengali women.
So I started an advanced search in the website for all the ladies in the age group of 21 to 28, unmarried, having educational qualification of graduate and above, residing in Kolkata and having a castebackground of Brahmins, Kayasthyas Khsatriyas and Vaidyas, and had their photos in their profile. The search returned 1148 results, of which 442 were not working(or are studying) and 706 ladies were working. Of the ladies who were working, 242 were in the income category of less than 1 Lakh INR of annual income, 293 ladies were earning from 1-2 Lakh INR, 128 ladies were earning 2-5 INR, 41 ladies were earning 5-10 Lakh INR, and 2 ladies were earning above 10Lakhs INR.
What was interesting to note that in their partner preferences, amongst all these working and non-working women, the count of women expecting that the groom should have a salary at least 4 times their own current salary (or above 6 lakh INR for the non-working women) was 666 or 58%. 32% or 367 ladies wanted a groom with a salary expectation of 2-4 times their own salary. Only 10% or 115 ladies had not mentioned the salary expectations from their partner, out of which 94 had not set any partner expectations, and thus their profiles could be considered incomplete. Only 13 ladies (all of who who were earning more than 8 lakh INR) had a partner expectation of a salary of 20 lakh or above, which in terms of sheer percentage, exceeds 200% their own annual income.
Now, amongst the 442 women who were not working, 242 were engaged in higher education and 200 have completed their education and were not working. Out of the latter group (Education completed and not working), 168were graduates and 42 were post-graduates. 70% of this segment (442) wanted apartner with an income of 8 Lakhs and above and 10% wanted a partner with an income of 10 lakhs and above. Of the women pursuing/completed post-graduation / Engineering / professional courses, 60 women had a preference for a partner earning more than 12 Lakh INR, 128 women wanted a partner with a salary of above 8 Lakh INR and only 26 women had a partner preference in terms of income below 6 Lakh INR. 30 women had not set their partner preferences. This was coming from a segment who are yet to start earning and thus yet to realize the practical hazards associated with even a low paying job.
What was surprising was that many women considered themselves “Brilliant as a student”, “highly qualified”, with “highly professional background” and yet had no jobs even in the age category of 24-26 after completion of their education or even did not manage to complete their post-graduation. Even the women with jobs where annual earning was less than 1 Lakh INR, considered themselves extremely “careerist” and wanted a husband who would support their ‘blossoming’ career with a pay-package of above 8 Lakhs INR. I would definitely not like to comment on their self perceptions when it came to external attributes, as compared to reality. These kind of attracted my attention since I am not a strong fan of narcissism.
Please note that I am definitely not against women working to unlock their true potential.
But today, few of these women need to recognize that if the burden of expectation was so much on the man to earn and provide for a luxurious living, why is it wrong for a man to expect that his partner would contribute more on the family management front? If your expectations from your partner in terms of earning potential was a few multiple of your own salary,how does one equate that to having equal job responsibilities in the career,and thus should share equal responsibilities in home also? If marriages are about equality, how are such partner expectation a reflection of equality in terms of providing overall resources for the welfare of the family?
By no means I am advocating that men don’t need to be concerned about house hold activities, they definitely do. I am strongly against the gender-job role biases in our society also.
I am only a strong advocate of true equality of all, and investment of comparable resources for the welfare of the family where both the partners have equal stakes.
Thus this amazingly stupid piece of research on which I spent 3 sleepless nights.
Some Idiots says, "Behind every successful man, there is a woman". But nobody wants to admit openly the fact that "Women prefer to go for the successful men only, given a choice". An article that came out later presented somewhat close views http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/Men-go-for-looks-women-profession/articleshow/6335911.cms
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Ogo Preyoshi
Ogo sundori, noyono madhuri, tumi je amari priya
Jonomer moto korecho kahil, more koriya tumi biya..
Ku buddhi dharini, rono chondi beshini, janilam tumi priye
Chinte pere bachlo mor sosur tomare chalan diye..
Kesh tomari sondhyar megh, kaanete tarar dul,
boli jodi kobhu bujhio preyoshi dicchi uddum gul..
Shoyone shopone, jodi heri tobo, chondro bodon shobha
ghum jay chuthi, atkiya uthi, raate aatonke hoi boba..
Tobe jotoi gali diyi tore ami, jani esob bekar
Trishito noyoney thakibo cheye tomar bhalo bashar..
Jonomer moto korecho kahil, more koriya tumi biya..
Ku buddhi dharini, rono chondi beshini, janilam tumi priye
Chinte pere bachlo mor sosur tomare chalan diye..
Kesh tomari sondhyar megh, kaanete tarar dul,
boli jodi kobhu bujhio preyoshi dicchi uddum gul..
Shoyone shopone, jodi heri tobo, chondro bodon shobha
ghum jay chuthi, atkiya uthi, raate aatonke hoi boba..
Tobe jotoi gali diyi tore ami, jani esob bekar
Trishito noyoney thakibo cheye tomar bhalo bashar..
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